Mama: You've had enough big life events in the last year. Let's not get married this year.
Me: Married? But I'm not even.....
Mama: Oh, I know, I know. But these things happen.
Me: Even if I were to fall in love and decide to marry someone, I wouldn't want to be engaged this year.
Mama: But you always said you wanted a Christmas wedding....
Me: Good grief, Mama, I've been unmarried for twenty-nine years already; I think I could manage to wait until the next Christmas.
Mama: But there might be a war.
Me: A war? So, you want me to move up the date of my hypothetical wedding because of a hypothetical war?
Mama [nodding]: He might be a spy. [pause] You know, I had a friend in college who had to get married in a hurry because her husband was going to jail. [pause] Don't marry someone who's going to jail.
Me: I won't. Unless it's for defending civil rights, or something like that.
Mama: Right. Don't marry someone going to jail unless he's going for a just cause.
Me: Okay, Mama. I promise.
|(From the State Library of Queensland. No known copyright restrictions)|